|this is my life at this stage in the game... HA HA HA
||[Nov. 20th, 2004|04:34 pm]
|||||thoughtful, tired, loved||]|
|||||smile like you mean it, the killers; bloody sunday, U2||]|
havent written in a while. its now a saturday in november and only ::thinking::.... four days until thanksgiving. That would be pretty cool if i didnt have this disease, whatever it may be. mom thinks its mono. i hope not. although i wouldn't mind taking a few days off from school this week, considering we only have two days to go. i've just been so busy lately, its nuts. its not healthy, i have decided. i try to do to much.i do homework,clubs, plays, teach, visit the old folks and try to save the world all before bedtime, making my bedtime very late. poor poor patrick, God bless him! because at the end of the day, hes the one who has to put up with the stressful moods i create for myself when i talk to him and I probably complain to him about everything. Pat if you read this, thankyou so much for being my friend and for putting up with my occasional (or frequent) pissy moods and for being there for me when i need someone to snap me out of my franticness and tell me they love me. i love you so so so much... you are a wonderful boy!
heey another reason why i dont want mono aside from feeling like crap, i wont be able to see anyone forever cuz i'll be sick. and i wont be able to see the spongebob movie this week! or see patrick! but its ok, cuz i feel good right now. of course, thats because im all dosed up on painkillers. but, like some old singer once said, accentuate the possitive.... even if the only positive that you have is supported by large amounts of medical drugs! hooray for drugs!! i have been temporarily freed from pain!
ooooh, and if i do have mono, i wont be able to play hockey which starts next week. AWESOME! wow what a perfect time to die...
i do beleive that this will be a super winter though cuz i'll be able to snowboard alot hopefully, now that i have people to go with. i think i might to quit some of my extra curriculars, at least temporarily, while im doing hockey. i've been over working myself and i just wanna chill out from now on. this sickness, whatever it is, has made me come to the realization that im not taking care of myself and that i need to slow down. i cant do everything. although sometimes trick myself into thinking that i can. LE SIIGH...
Hey, another positive! ITS ALMOST CHRISTMAS SEASON! ::gasp of delight:: I get to go christmas shoppin for all my pals and my lovies... isnt that wonderful? :) I think so! now i just have to figure out what to get everyone... shoppin shoppin shoppin!! YAY! and making cake! double YAY!
IN THE WORLD TODAY:
well our troops are in iraq. they hate us. they dont want us there. we've turned our soldiers into killing machines, we've brain washed them, we've sent them to be killed. i think thats enough. michelle's mom is out there somewhere, in kuwait i think. i wish they could all just come home. its not right! let the Iraqi's live the way they want to! they dont want to have a democracy and they don't want our help, that is obvious. anyone could see that. so why are we still there? oil. greed.
a u.s. marine supposedly was caught on tape shooting an unarmed wounded man in a mosque. the tape was then showed on the arab media station al-jazeera to be exposed to and enrage the entire iraqi people. if this is a true war crime, why is it a surprise to u.s. military or such a shock to the iraqi people that this happened? the iraqis werent in any better conditions when they were being mass slaughtered by their own beloved fucking dictator before we came in their and tried to save their asses. moreover, the u.s. marines train their men to conform into killing machines, and in war, dont you think that one would lose all sense of humanity after being superexposed to killing, torture and death everyday? don't you think these men fighting this war might lose their sense of empathy towards other human life after they have been trained to kill? so what else should u.s. marine officials expect? thats war, that is what it does to people. if it doesnt take away life, it takes away humanity.
however, the marine officials are not even sure if this was even a true war crime because often, terrorists have staged false "crimes" in order to gain anti american backlash from the iraqi people. so yeah. thats another pleasant aspect of war. either way, true or false, the iraqi people are now further convinced that americans are evil and are even more hostile towards our troops and our country.
subsequently, in retaliation to this supposed war crime, an iraqi soldier shot Margaret Hassan (showed on video tape), the director of the CARE program for releif in Iraq, an Iraqi citizin married to an Iraqi man, who helped give aid and help to the Iraqi people for over 35 years. the tv station al-jazeera never showed this videotape on the network because, as the broadcasting director said "it was unnecessary to show that tape of a killing." of course it wasn't for your sake you bastard. none of the iraqis know that she was shot in retaliation. the arab media are trying to make this seem like a one-sided war. the iraqis are willing to beleive it. they dont want our help. they dont want democracy. they are not a democratic nation now, they never were, and they never will be because they don't think that way. let them live with their own culture. if that means that they will suffer, let it be. if they want change that bad, they will change themselves. it shouldnt be our job to go in there and have our troops get killed to save the Iraqis' ungrateful selves. its not fair. i dont think its about democracy anymore...
well anyway, after that tyrade i feel better. i just needed to get that out. thats how i feel.
but i have to go get ready for the play. thats right, im taking it easy just like the doctor ordered, by going out and performing in a play... ha ha